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Writer's pictureBrigham Elton

Pornography has Altered our Sexual Template

Updated: Apr 6, 2020

Recognize how pornography has altered your view of real sex, effecting your relationships and causing your degree of disconnection.


How has pornography effected your view of sex and how has that effected your relationships with others? Pornography depicts an illusion of intimacy that causes disconnection. It skews what real sex is and can lead to physical, mental, and emotional struggles.


Consider what you consume, how you consume, and how frequently you consume. These three aspects will help you recognize how pornography has altered your view of real sex, effecting your relationships and causing your degree of disconnection.


For the Individual


What you Consume:


  • What level of pornography are you viewing?


How you Consume:


  • What medium (books, videos, chat rooms, gif, photos) are you consuming through?

  • What device are you consuming on?

  • What time of the day are you consuming at?

  • What amount of time are you spending consuming?

  • Is masturbation involved?

  • How long do you consume one image, video, etc before switching to another?


Frequency of Use:


  • How many times a week are you consuming?


After considering your answers to these questions you can see how far away from reality your perception of sex is. Pornography is not what sex is. If you feed the idea that what you see in pornography is how sex really is you won't find real connection.


For the Parent

These same aspects still apply to Parents of people who are consuming pornography. The difference is what is being consumed. This could be media that sends messages about physical intimacy or sex, messages about your body, or messages about how relationships should look or feel. Using the same questions substitute ‘consuming’ for some of these other messages you are getting.


For the Supporter: Partner or Friend

Just as these aspects apply to parents they apply to the supporters too. You are not exempt from false messages of intimacy just because you may not be consuming pornography.


“Understanding how pornography has altered your sexual template can help you recognize where you are from reality. Now it's only a matter of getting back to a healthy view of sex and intimacy.”
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